I recently had a phone conversation with a good friend from middle school . She was telling me to pray for another old school friend that was facing some challenging times and has been left feeling broken and really low. As we continued to talk, I said something and she responded “I don’t even know who I am”. Those words struck my heart because I was so terribly sorry and sad that she was feeling this way.
Do you ever find yourself asking “Who am I”? How many times do we put on a smile everyday only to push through each day to get to the next? But underneath that smile, you are feeling lost and broken. Maybe something has happened in your life that has left your feeling ridiculously insecure. You are feeling like you are not enough, like you can’t seem to rise from the darkness and insecurities. You feel that you have lost yourself along the way in this life and don’t know how to find yourself.
I know all of that oh so well. Those feelings used to sting me all the time and I would battle with my mind and thoughts. I would try to chase who I was back then in my early twenties. I have been there! I understand it all and sometimes I tread waters back there before I can begin to reassure myself of the truth.
Becoming aware of who you are is a journey. A journey to tossing aside all that you thought you were and who you thought you were supposed to be. Tossing aside the comparison game. Its a journey of seeking God for yourself and seeking the truth of what he says you are. Knowing who you are in Christ becomes your identity for you to stand tall, to stand strong. Because when you know that truth, it lights a fire inside of you and shuts out the nonsense that has been filling your thoughts and mind.
Sure, there may have been some names that others have called you or labeled you as, but that does not define you. You are a CHILD of God. All these things that we are going after and seeking, have been taking up the space for us to know and understand who we are. When we use that time to seek the Father, he will work on us and help us to understand who we were created to be. But that first step is to truly know who you are in Christ and NO ONE can take that from you.
 When we compare ourselves with other people, it steals so much from us. Comparison is the thief of everything. We were each created uniquely and God has a wonderful plan for each of our lives. You were never created to be like someone else. ONLY YOU can bring all of who you are to the kingdom. Just think about that. Some of us seem to walk into that plan sooner that others, but that does not mean that you won’t. Some of us have to wait a little bit longer or even a few years. I am one of the latter. And that is so okay! God needed to work on me a bit longer and orchestrate his plan in order to bring it to fruition. I didn’t always understand that, but now I do.
 But as we allow God to work through us, more and more is revealed and pieces to the puzzle start to come together. So I encourage you to seek God. Seek Him for yourself. All of who he is, his love for you, his truth on who he says we are and little by little you will begin to see the light that was there to shine all along.
Much Love,
Crystal K.

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