A friend of mine challenged me to do a ‘getting into the spirit” photo journal or diary I should say. The holiday season has changed drastically for me and my family since my mom passed away on Christmas Eve of 2013. No matter what things look like on the outside, there is so much more on the inside. The holidays are supposed to be a happy time, celebrating the birth of our Savior, Jesus Christ, filled with making memories, giving back to those that are less fortunate, decorating and so much more. A part of me wanted to skip Christmas, a part of me wanted to decorate, while another part was saying “why bother”.
There were just so many emotions wrapped up in what to do right for the holidays. I shed tears almost daily during this season and a part of me truly left when my mom left. I guess I have been trying to get it back, but it didn’t seem like that was ever going to happen. I hear some say they are never the same after the loss of someone so close and I totally get that, 100%, but they also say they have learned to adapt. That part right there, I guess I do it okay, but when I actually break it down to think about it, do I even know how to adapt after all this?
I want to erase the painful memories. And for someone that has photographic memory, I am sure its worse. I can remember where people sat in the church, who hugged me first, the stories that were told, how much of a wreck i was when i stood up to talk about her, how I “mingled” in the parking lot after the service was over saying my very last goodbye. It was absolutely horrible!
The good new is, it is a NEW year, and I hold on to the hope that this can get better. So I agreed to do the journal/diary. It helped me to focus on what really matters and living on purpose. Since that was something new, I am glad that I was able to take photos almost everyday! I did lose track of the days. I did plan to blog every day with the pic of the day, but that didn’t work to well. So here is a collection of them all!
Enjoy a peek into our lives from the holidays.